You can get two marks for writing f-off on a GCSE exam paper.

You could get three if you add an exclamation mark.

Well, you do if you’re a top examiner. But you don’t if you are the body he works for, apparently.

If only I’d known, or had been brave enough to try myself.

I could have boosted my pitiful Economics A-level grade by suggesting to the examiners what they could do with the law of diminishing marginal returns…sideways, with a !

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