No, not a chance in hell.

Episode three of Bonekickers was as hackneyed and laughable as the previous two.

This series has a habit of rewriting history, only for the amazing discoveries to be lost forever in a fiery finale or rock collapse – if it wasn’t for those pesky hot-headed archaeologists jumping in with their size 9s instead of being more considered in their excavations the truth would have surely been revealed.

But Bonekickers is actually making history. It is becoming the greatest waste of licence payers’ money the BBC has pulled off since Eldorado.

Half-way through and the on-going mystery of “the sword” is adding a further “eh?” factor to the overall mess of the series.

This time it was ancient Rome and the Celts who were subjected to the Bonekickers boneheaded approach.

Can you smell something? Is that deadly gas?

No, it is still just a big pile of stinking poo.

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7 responses »

  1. David Ord says:

    I missed the first two episodes, but the third was bad enough to have a certain awful grandeur. I’m not usually a subscriber to the “so bad it’s almost good” school, but I fully intend to watch future episodes (if there are any) because anything that can get me giggling hysterically after a day writing press releases just has to be worth watching.

  2. Paul Groves says:

    David: Thanks for the stopping by, but I cannot agree. Bonekickers is so awful it doesn’t even deserve to be a cult classic.

    I will also be tuning in for the rest of the series purely to confirm just how angry Bonekickers makes me feel. I might even pen a “Why oh? Why oh? Why oh?…” style letter to Points of View about the waste of licence payers’ money. But as my wife pays our TV licence I’m on shaky ground there.

    No wonder she refused to watch it with me again last night and I had to get up at 6am to watch a recording.

    I’m beginning to think I’m obsessed about Bonekickers in a slightly deranged way.

  3. David Ord says:

    I agree that Bonekickers redefines awfulness, but there may have been a plague of dialogue crapness visiting TV drama last night. During a crucial operation one of the surgeons in Holby City muttered through gritted teeth “I’m not giving up on this kid…”

    Needless to say,the kid croaked.

  4. Paul Groves says:

    David: I do like a happy ending…

  5. Andyf says:

    I loved the bit in the first episode where they have got two dead people in a cellar full of burning crosses, including burning the “One True” Cross”. Do they try to put the fire out? Do they try to resuce the artefacts? Do they await the rescue services? NO! The Indiana Jones clone announces “lets go to the pub!” I cried, I laughed. It’s ludicrous…Then I wake up in a cold sweat, did my licence fee pay for this?

  6. […] Third time lucky for Bonekickers? […]

  7. Bob says:

    Beeb, Beeb, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Ceeb… Why is it that a show that was clearly well funded and had the true backing of the BBC at its best could be allowed to give Eldorado a run for it’s money.

    The BBC can produce some fine productions, Dr Who and Life on Mars being some recent pinnacles of success, however this recent productoin, with potential of being thoughly engaging, turned out to be complete and utter pap. Even endulging in the ” its not serious, its an adventure, just let yourself enjoy it”, mantra, its unconvincing characters with cheesy dialogue, huge dollups of overacting and poor plots makes this one of the most hopeful productions since red dwarf 8; it could be cult so we won’t notice the flaws.

    The most annoying thing about this show is that given the audience were prepared to suspend their beliefes and buy into it, which given the recent Da Vinci Code and Indy IV sucesses, many are, why did they take a kernal of a good idea, invest great deals of money on it, and then not care about the laclutsre and obviously flaw ridden results.

    Oppotunity missed. Nice idea, poor implementation.

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